This is the feeling that filled my heart this morning as I finished reading my scriptures. I took a moment to soak it in and wonder in awe at the amazing way things fall into place. They take their course and work themselves out.
At this time last year, was the beginning of turmoil and struggles that seemed endless. I had just come back to America in March. I had no job, no home, no money and nowhere to lay my head at night. It was so devastating after having been so independent and earning well for a while before I had to leave to India. I was also in a brand new relationship and this put such a strain on both of us.
There were days and sometimes a few days in a row when things just seemed bleak and I did not know if I had the strength to pull myself up and put a smile on my face. I wondered what direction my life was going to take and if I would be prepared for what was ahead. The one thing I knew with absolute certainty was that the Lord would not abandon me. He has come through for me many times before and I knew He would again. I just kept hoping that I was learning all that I was supposed to learn and changing where I needed to be changed. This does not mean that the struggles went away or that I did not have any bad days any more. Those still persisted, but I received the comfort and strength of the Lord through various people, especially Aaron, and things started to get better.
I had to learn new things – to rid myself of pride, learn to give more freely of what I had, and it was easier this time, because I had nothing to give in terms of material things, so I gave other things like friendship and love; I had to learn to be humble by interviewing for jobs that never would have crossed my mind earlier, and actually accept one for a few weeks – that taught me more humility.
I worked hard and prayed that the Lord would fill in the rest. Gradually, once the storm subsides, and you are stripped naked of all those things that have weighed you down for a long time, you know that you have done your best and that the Lord will reward you by blessing you more than you know. This experience has strengthened and brought Aaron and I closer to each other. My blessings are abundant, my heart is full and I am grateful.
