A walking drugstore
I've had enough antibiotics to hang up my name right next to the CVS symbol on Duke Street. You know it's bad when your doctor jumps 10 feet backwards, with the most ghastly look on his face, as he takes one quick look at the back of your throat, while your mouth is open. It is really quite unfair! How can one be expected to have any modicum of etiquette and respond in a lady-like manner, if one is sitting in a doctors' office, on paper that makes crumpling sounds, and one's mouth gaping open?
"That bad, huh?", was all I could say, when I had a chance to close my mouth and return to somewhat normal facial position. He says, "Don't go in to work unless you are willing to give everyone else my business cards—they will need it once you are done there!" Quite a morale booster, that one!
It seems to be my fate to deal with one of these every year, so one would think that I would not be such a crabby cactus. But, oooh, I get prickly after 3 days of breathing through my mouth so much that I could use my tongue to sand down the dining table. Or, after 3 days of using so many tissues, that I could easily win the vote for Kleenex Spokesperson of the Year.
It is during this time when my usually, somewhat dormant (emphasis on somewhat), sarcastic nature reaches new heights. So it is probably best that I was advised to stay home till I am no longer contagious :)
Hope the rest of you stay healthy and safe!